Beep, boop, beep, boop.
Gack! (officially my favourite sound effect, for anyone keeping track.) I went and did something last night that I shouldn’t have done. That I promised myself I wouldn’t do. That I told other people I was promising myself not to do. And that I told them they should physically prevent me from doing. I watched the premiere of 24. And now, I’m in for the whole season. Sigh. I have really got to stop doing this to myself.
I HATE 24 with the hate of a thousand burning suns.
I hate the way the phones ring, all ‘bip, bip – beeeeooooop.” I hate the way a flight to Mexico will take an hour on the first leg, but will miraculously only take 20 minutes on the return trip. I hate how the President of the United States seems to have no allies besides Jack Bauer. Groan. I hate how they kept trying to work Nina and Sherry into the subsequent seasons just because they worked in the first season. I hate, hate, hate Kim and the cougar howling in the woods and how I was supposed to believe she would actually want to work for CTU. Wtf was up with that?? I hate tangents and unresolved plot lines and stories dropped just for the hell of it because the writers have no clue how to build a coherent arc, and I hate the darting eyes overlaid with the suspicious music. Hate it. I think that’s all. No, wait, I also hate Chloe. I think her character is annoying as hell and a big old turd.
But the problem with 24 is that it’s like a roller-coaster ride. Once you get on, you can’t get off halfway through the ride. So now that I got sucked into watching the premiere, I know that I’m in for the season. I’m in for 22 more hours of yelling at the television about how absurd it is being. (Because it’s the television’s fault. Actually, I know whose fault it is, it’s the writers of the show and I’m hoping that they can hear me as I try to communicate through the pixels.) Why, oh why am I doing this to myself? Four weeks from now I know I’m going to be rolling my eyes, throwing things at the television, and threatening (emptily,) never to watch the show again if they want me to believe that Jack Bauer is capable of reviving his partner using CPR after said partner has been flat-lined for a good five minutes (beep, boop, beep, boop…) and after Jack has:
a) survived a car bomb,
b) been administered truth serum in a terrorist inquisition,
c) hijacked a helicopter by jumping from the window ledge of an 80-story building, or
d) all three of the above, in any mind-bogglingly unrealistic order.
Here’s the problem with 24. I’ve heard that the first season was fantastic. I haven’t actually ever seen it, because I was in Japan watching eighty-eight year old Japanese grandmas compete in quiz shows. I’ve also heard that the writers of the first season wrote the whole 24 hours (or at least plotted them out,) before the series went into shooting. But since the success of the first season, they haven’t bothered to keep up that good practice, perhaps because they’re worried about plotlines leaking, I don’t know. So now, the writers are just, you know, winging it. And this has led to some serious jumping of the shark as the pacing becomes uneven, the characters become caricatures of themselves and the suspension of reality has reached such fantastic proportions that it’s not really even possible anymore. There are physical constraints to the universe people, please, at the very least try to abide by the laws of thermodynamics and gravity! I don’t think that’s asking too much.
But there’s good news for me this season. The President is no longer in office. There’s no Nina, no Sherry, and no Kim! (Which, hopefully, means no cougars.) Hallelujah! They have completely cleaned house with the cast. Thank god! And Shawn Doyle showed up in the premiere! I love him! He was the reason I watched The Eleventh Hour – and he’s very capable. I’m hoping they didn’t actually kill him off in the first two hours of the day, because if they did, what a shame, what a waste. Maybe he’s too busy playing Gabrielle and Carlos’s lawyer on Desperate Housewives. Of course, there’s still Chloe, and there’s still darting eyes all over the place, but one can’t expect miracles. So I’m on the roller-coaster, again, for better or for worse. I’ll let you know if it’s a good ride.
I HATE 24 with the hate of a thousand burning suns.
I hate the way the phones ring, all ‘bip, bip – beeeeooooop.” I hate the way a flight to Mexico will take an hour on the first leg, but will miraculously only take 20 minutes on the return trip. I hate how the President of the United States seems to have no allies besides Jack Bauer. Groan. I hate how they kept trying to work Nina and Sherry into the subsequent seasons just because they worked in the first season. I hate, hate, hate Kim and the cougar howling in the woods and how I was supposed to believe she would actually want to work for CTU. Wtf was up with that?? I hate tangents and unresolved plot lines and stories dropped just for the hell of it because the writers have no clue how to build a coherent arc, and I hate the darting eyes overlaid with the suspicious music. Hate it. I think that’s all. No, wait, I also hate Chloe. I think her character is annoying as hell and a big old turd.
But the problem with 24 is that it’s like a roller-coaster ride. Once you get on, you can’t get off halfway through the ride. So now that I got sucked into watching the premiere, I know that I’m in for the season. I’m in for 22 more hours of yelling at the television about how absurd it is being. (Because it’s the television’s fault. Actually, I know whose fault it is, it’s the writers of the show and I’m hoping that they can hear me as I try to communicate through the pixels.) Why, oh why am I doing this to myself? Four weeks from now I know I’m going to be rolling my eyes, throwing things at the television, and threatening (emptily,) never to watch the show again if they want me to believe that Jack Bauer is capable of reviving his partner using CPR after said partner has been flat-lined for a good five minutes (beep, boop, beep, boop…) and after Jack has:
a) survived a car bomb,
b) been administered truth serum in a terrorist inquisition,
c) hijacked a helicopter by jumping from the window ledge of an 80-story building, or
d) all three of the above, in any mind-bogglingly unrealistic order.
Here’s the problem with 24. I’ve heard that the first season was fantastic. I haven’t actually ever seen it, because I was in Japan watching eighty-eight year old Japanese grandmas compete in quiz shows. I’ve also heard that the writers of the first season wrote the whole 24 hours (or at least plotted them out,) before the series went into shooting. But since the success of the first season, they haven’t bothered to keep up that good practice, perhaps because they’re worried about plotlines leaking, I don’t know. So now, the writers are just, you know, winging it. And this has led to some serious jumping of the shark as the pacing becomes uneven, the characters become caricatures of themselves and the suspension of reality has reached such fantastic proportions that it’s not really even possible anymore. There are physical constraints to the universe people, please, at the very least try to abide by the laws of thermodynamics and gravity! I don’t think that’s asking too much.
But there’s good news for me this season. The President is no longer in office. There’s no Nina, no Sherry, and no Kim! (Which, hopefully, means no cougars.) Hallelujah! They have completely cleaned house with the cast. Thank god! And Shawn Doyle showed up in the premiere! I love him! He was the reason I watched The Eleventh Hour – and he’s very capable. I’m hoping they didn’t actually kill him off in the first two hours of the day, because if they did, what a shame, what a waste. Maybe he’s too busy playing Gabrielle and Carlos’s lawyer on Desperate Housewives. Of course, there’s still Chloe, and there’s still darting eyes all over the place, but one can’t expect miracles. So I’m on the roller-coaster, again, for better or for worse. I’ll let you know if it’s a good ride.
posted by nerdifer at 11:30 a.m.
2 Comments:
Hee. I got a shout-out.
http://www.24weblog.com/
And yes, I really do mean it.
If it entertains you then it's good? Are you sure? Because I can think of plenty of examples to the contrary. I watch a soap opera, it's entertaining, but it's not good. And yet, there I am, everyday in front of the TV. Plenty of FOX reality programming is ridiculously entertaining, but I'd cringe if I tried to call it good (Joe Millionaire, I'm looking your way.) Conversely, I considered the movie "Saving Private Ryan" excellent, but not entertaining. One isn't necessarily synonymous with the other.
The supposed real-time format of 24 is meant to ground the show in a foundation of reality. That the writers abandon the very premise upon which the show is based is just plain laziness and a real pet-peeve of mine. True, I can't help myself from watching it, so I'm pretty much asking for it. The reality is, the show has so much potential and I would much prefer to sit around on Tuesdays praising it for being excellent instead of feeling frustrated that I can't seem to stop watching even though it is deeply flawed. There you have it - hate to love it, love to hate it.
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